Hope in a Time of Exhaustion

 

We are exhausted. 

We are exhausted, 

so we say, don't worry 2021 is coming. 

We are a people in need of hope and answers. And yet, we're exhausted. 

Things still feel dark. If we are honest, those feelings of joy and cheer feel fake and contrived this year; 

So we watch some more Hallmark movies in the hopes that we start to feel it; that joy we yearn for so badly, even if we know it's temporary. 

And maybe for an hour and a half we feel some semblance of it; we grasp it and hold it tightly wishing so badly that it would stick around.

But it leaves and we are left in our exhaustion. 

Because this year has brought pain and heartbreak. 

It has brought death and amplified loneliness, and these things don't just go away.

Grief and loneliness linger. They proade and poke until we finally say, OK, fine! 

And yet, we are reminded that a scared and lonely Mary was told to hope. Even more, she was told that Hope lived inside her.

Some are reminded of hope as they light another candle; remembering that the impossible is possible and the light will prevail.  

We view hope as some grand gesture; a miraculous event,

The Hallmark movie of our lives.

But maybe we have the wrong idea of hope.

Maybe those huge moments aren't supposed to be the norm.

What if hope is meant to be small?

A flower growing underneath the snow.

A warm day in the midst of a cold winter.

The excitement our children still feel as they wait for Christmas morning, no matter how different it may look this year.

These small pieces of hope might give us a moment, but the darkness will inevitably creep back in, it always does.

Hate will spew and families will go hungry.

Children will be locked in cadges and bad men will be let off.

But, the flower;

We have to remember to look at the flower.

Remember that in the morning, the sun will rise because it always does.

The sun promises hope, however small that may feel.

So we hold on to the light in the midst of the darkness. We hold it in the midst of our exhaustion even if we're not sure when we will rest.

Maybe this is all we can do, even if it doesn't feel like enough. 

Maybe that's what hope asks of us.

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